The following are sayings that I made up or have heard ("in quotes") that are meaningful to me. Underlined sayings are ones I especially like. No hurry to read them all, it's long...
Learning & Openness
It’s all about learning – lifelong learning
Be open to new ways of perceiving what you experience
“Things aren’t always what they seem”
“The greatest risk, it’s been said, is not taking any”
“Think for yourself”, yet be open to learning from others
“Keep your eye on the big picture”
“There will always be mysteries to life”
“Question the rules”
Question your thoughts and feelings, as well as those of others
Truth is relative to perspective – different perspective makes for different truth
Each of us is making it up as we go along, doing our best with what we’ve learned and experienced, and who we are as individuals
Imagine seeing every individual issue or event within a much larger context. That could transform one's initial impression
“Question everything you've heard about what's right and wrong”
“Is the glass half full or half empty,” is a misleading question. The answer is, both
Life requires ongoing adjustments and changes
Don't be too attached to who you think I am or who you think you are
I always know that I never know :-)
Be open to change
“Take nothing for granted”
Right and wrong, good and bad, are all human constructs, and they change depending on the person and time
Creativity alone is not enough, it needs reality checking to see how it works out
“Question all the answers”
Meaning of life is assigned by self, not given from outside of self
My meaning to life is to keep moving
My meaning to life is to stay in intimate contact with others
Don't believe, or disbelieve, your thoughts
Don't assume your thoughts and feelings are accurate. Reality Check frequently!
“Don't stop now”
Love & Empathy
Empathy is love, love is empathy
Live in your emotional body. Let your mind be a tool of your heart, not visa versa. Use your mind to help lead from your heart
Listen and speak from your heart and feelings
It is a gift to others to ask them about themselves and show interest in their lives
Empathy is our connection with all other life
All human beings are my family
Live from your heart
“Do unto others” as you think they would want you to do unto them
“If we listen to the voices in our hearts, we’d find we’re not so far apart”
Experience the gift of love – both giving and receiving
“The eyes are the window to the soul,” if you are able to see
Antisocial Personality
Sociopaths feel little or no fear, guilt or empathy
Smart sociopaths easily lie and pretend to get what they want from others
Sociopaths 'love' caring and empathic people because they are so easily manipulated
Sociopaths rise to the top and rule, to our collective demise
Sociopaths, psychopaths and narcissists all have very similar antisocial qualities
Sociopaths don't trust others because they themselves are not trustworthy
For a sociopath or a psychopath, it doesn't matter to them whether they tell the truth or lie
Empathic people trust others because they themselves are trustworthy
Empathic people are fundamentally different from narcissists or sociopaths.
Most empathic people don't understand the very different reality of sociopaths. If they did, they would limit the sociopath's power
If there were no aggressors, there would be no war
“Competition’s good” – for the winners. It sucks for the losers
“Greed is good” – for the greedy individual, but is bad for society
The indulgence and neglect of today will be paid for by those of the future
Capitalism: by the rich, for the rich
Free Market Capitalism is individual greed made legal!
In a competitive system such as capitalism, resources are greatly unevenly distributed
The only people who can get into social power are sociopaths and psychopaths. The people with empathy get taken out by those who lack empathy and fear
Beware of charismatic and charming people, often they are manipulating others for their own benefit
Human nature for competitive and aggressive people is fundamentally different from the human nature of cooperative people
Living In The Present
Being present is living in one's heart and body
Our needs and feelings connect us with the present moment
How I feel is more important to me than what I think
Live in the present. If not, come back to the present
Don’t ask yourself, “How should I feel.” Instead, ask, “How do I feel.”
Go to a place deep inside yourself and notice what your mind is doing
Breathe Freely
Relax into your breathing
The only moment in which you can respond is this one
The only moment that really matters is this one
Breathe into your heart
Right/wrong consciousness is fundamentally different from connection consciousness
"Life moves toward pleasure and away from pain"
The way to presence is not devoid of the past. It is through it and with it.
A meditation: There is nothing to do, nowhere to go. All there is is the present moment, with breathing and heart beating and the experience of life
If we listen with our minds to our feelings, they will communicate with us. It takes an open mind to notice our feelings
Rid yourself of your ego, live in your heart instead
In the present moment is where life happens
Embrace Play
Embrace Humility
Embrace Moderation
Embrace Acceptance
Embrace Tenacity
My heart only knows the present
Life is a series of letting go. Every present moment fades into the past and opens up to the next present moment
Being present contains all the past
Presence has no agenda
Every moment is new
“There is no time like the present” :-)
My heart knows how it feels. I, my consciousness, just has to pay attention :-)
There is nothing to prove
“Cross that bridge when you get there”
Processing feelings involves both thinking and feeling
“One step at a time”
I don't really have a choice about how I feel in the moment. I can choose to acknowledge and experience it, or reject it, but the feeling is there regardless. Best I pay attention and learn from it
I, in the present moment, am the sum total of all my life experience
Speaking from one's heart is a different language than many of us have learned
Stay present
Understanding with our head is different than understanding with our heart
Living in the "flow" of life means life is constantly changing and uncertain. Living in the "know" of life means life is defined and stagnant
Life is always changing
It's difficult to be present when pains from the past have not been healed. Needed is establishing a relationship with those past pains and integrating them into our 'present' selves. Not an emotionally easy task!
Imagine having no ego
Live in an open mental state of, "I do not know"
There is no hurry
“Life is the journey, not the destination”
From a place of presence, there is no seeking, just being
Move your consciousness from your head to your heart and body. Listen from deep within yourself
If you seek to avoid discomfort, you will also avoid living in the present. For me, living in the present means there's no agenda and nothing to avoid. If I have discomfort in the present moment, that's what I will need to be with in order to stay present. If I seek to change my present state, I won't be present within myself
Have no pretence
Environmental Catastrophe
The human race is acting like cancer on Earth
If humans don’t stop their growth, nature will, and it will be disastrous
Our way of life (the top 10% consumers) is destroying not only a lot of other life, but our own as well
The demands of the human race are way more than the Earth can provide for or tolerate
Most human technology is destructive to nature, and ultimately destructive to us
For the human race, it's apparent we can't keep growing (in population, consumption and pollution) without destroying nature. We must learn to live more lightly upon the Earth, Now!
We live in times of exponential growth, unlike anything in human history. Like bacteria in a petri dish, we will exceed our carrying capacity quickly
The cooperative must contain the aggressive in order for our species to last much longer
The most 'invasive species', by far, is the one who invented the term
Society
Society’s ‘rules’ change, depending upon the situations and people involved. What’s right today may not be tomorrow
Cooperation’s based upon trust. Competition's based upon distrust
Any social system that works must address the needs of the individual as well as the needs of the whole society
Thinking that the people we elect are in charge is a mistake
Language provides structure and limits to our understanding
Our technological development has grown tremendously while our social development has not
Living cooperatively is key to human development
We are, most of us anyway, such emotional beings. American culture doesn't recognize this
Most religions are divisive
Most religious people think all the other religions are wrong – and they’re right – they are ALL wrong!
We, Homo Sapiens, are an accumulation of 4 billion years of life on Earth. We are the result of billions of years of evolution
Complex human language has enormously increased our learning and development
“History is written by the winners”
All languages are made up
All religions are made up
Virtual reality is an oxymoron :-)
Sustainable development is an oxymoron
Personal Responsibility
As long as I blame my parents (or anyone else) for my problems, I won’t be responsible for them, and consequently will feel and act helpless to do anything about them
Encourage others to take responsibility for their needs
The first step toward fixing or changing sadness, or any uncomfortable feeling, is to accept it, just as it is :-)
Healing from past trauma and hurts is rarely easy
So much of life is not in our control, but I put my attention where I think I might have some
Pay off debt quickly
Freedom without responsibility can be very dangerous
Good intentions can turn out bad! Reality check the outcome to see if they worked out as intended
“Use it or lose it!”
“Actions speak louder than words”
Focus on, what is my present moment emotional reality, and what's next
“Courage is not acting without fear, it is acting with it”
“Anger never comes first. It is a reaction to feeling fear or pain”
“Create a pause between a stimulus and response”
Denial can be a useful short-term strategy but is generally counterproductive in the long term
Each of us needs to think, feel and act true to ourselves.
Growing up is a lifelong process, the best time to practice is in the present moment
Get Competitive About Being Cooperative :-)
Be sure to confront the bullies in the playground
“All my heroes have been laid to rest and all my idols I have come to possess”
"Your intention behind your communication is more important than the communication tools used"
Instead of grow up, grow into our whole being, spanning back to our birth
Emotional reactivity is a reflection of past unresolved hurts
When emotionally reactive, it is difficult to be loving or let in love from others
“The best apology is a change in behavior”
“What are you going to do?” I don’t know – I’ll think of something!
My intention: to strengthen my loving relationship with myself and others, and live more fully in the present moment
Acceptance
Acceptance has nothing to do with right and wrong, it is simply the acknowledgement of something
Self-awareness is being conscious of ones thoughts, feelings, needs and sensing.
Self-acceptance requires self-awareness and self-compassion
We live in the center of the universe, for a brief moment in time. Yet, in the moments of our lives, we think and experience this as everything.
“Get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable!”
Being attached to being right is a problem!
Embrace life even when sad and crying, scared, or frustrated and angry
Acceptance leads to understanding
Accept other people's impressions and judgements as just that - their impressions and judgements.
Accept mistakes as part of living, focus on learning from them. Sometimes ‘mistakes’ turn out to be not mistakes at all!
Let your mind lovingly accept all feelings in your heart and body, whether happy, sad, angry or afraid
If you accept your feelings, they will speak to you, and for you!
All life is temporary
Shame is the opposite of self-acceptance
Accepting feelings allows you to process them, when not accepting them they process you
Let go of all expectations
Relationships
It's not true that “it takes two people to fight” or to mess up a relationship. What is true is that it takes two healthy people to maintain a healthy relationship. One person can get in the way of having a loving and respectful relationship
Mutual respect is crucial to healthy relationships
“To thy own self be true.” Don't forget to consider other people and other life forms as well :-)
"Happiness is attractive"
Defensiveness is the opposite of openness
Complex human language has enormously increased our ability to understand ourselves and each other
Acting nice is a pretence if you are feeling frustrated or angry
Essential to successful relationships is the ability and motivation to resolve interpersonal conflicts. It requires both/all people to have the skills and interest
"Using Guilt likely produces two responses: they do what you want and resent you, or they do the opposite" (and resent you)
Mutuality is essential in relationships
“Together” in cooperation we stand. "Divided" in competition we fall
Each person has their own experience of the meaning of any interpersonal interaction. What is of essence is the ability to arrive at a deeper understanding of each others unique perspective and hopefully resolve conflicts or misunderstandings
Frequently, smart people disagree with each other
The more our needs are fulfilled, the easier it is to give to others
People in denial have something in common, they don't want to talk about it
Sarcasm reflects anger and pain
“Pick your battles,” or better yet, find a way to avoid them
Tone of voice means more than the words used, especially if there is a conflict between the two
There is no having a conversation with somebody who has the truth
Give to others what it is you want from them
Don't do for others what they can do for themselves, except on special occasions
The antidote to perceived criticism from others is self-compassion
“Positive feelings reflects needs met. Negative feelings reflects needs unmet”
It's hard to trust people when you've had past hurts from them
“Better to be Loving than to be Right”
The saying, "you can't love others until you love yourself," is missing something essential. We learn to love ourselves from receiving love from others
Trust requires cooperation
Lying is corrosive to relationships
Jealousy is corrosive to relationships
Fun
There is no future, until it happens!
Never always :-)
